JustPlainSandi

He Makes all Things Beautiful – in His Time

I have been thinking a lot about timing – God’s timing versus our timing.  God’s plans versus our plans. 

Sometimes our plans ARE God’s plans, but they’re not in His time.

I’ve been married twice, and I have 3 kids by three dads, one to whom I was married.  Because I chose to do things my way, in my time, people got hurt.  I don’t know what my life would have been like had I trusted Him, but I do know that there would have been a whole lot less pain.

Romans 6:23a says, “For the wages of sin is death”.  Sin is anything that goes against God’s order, against His plan, against His rules.  He created each of us, you and me, with a design, a purpose and a plan.  My own lack of faith resulted in the deaths of relationships, death of feelings, and death of trust.  For my kids, it resulted in more of the same.  A couple of my sons have already begun down the “death walk” of multiple marriages and relationships and I hate watching – even more so since I know the pain that is going to result.

When my second husband left to live his own life, I vowed 5 years of living single so that I could learn to trust God, heal and find out who I am.  The first 3 years were easy.  I was angry, hurt and bitter and didn’t want anyone to share my life.  During that period of time, God began healing me, binding the wounds, reopening scars to cleanse the wounds to make me fully healed from the inside out.  He was teaching me what it is in me that was making me attracted to the men to whom I was attracted.  In the process, I found contentment and peace in my Savior.

Then, out of the blue, I have been finding my heart wandering again.  Suddenly the 5 year vow seems to be restrictive and bothersome.

But, I think about Abraham and Sarah.  They moved out of God’s timing and tried to force His hand.  They’d been promised a son.  At their old age, surely there was another method than the “traditional” way….and Hagar bore Abraham a son of the flesh, who didn’t receive the promise nor the inheritance.  Because of their disbelief, the wages for their sin are still being paid – death and war among the Israelies and all of their Arab enemies.

I think about Moses, who being the promised rescuer, moved in his own time and killed the Egyptian.  Because he didn’t wait for God’s timing, he ended up spending 40 years tending sheep.  Later, when his temper got the best of him, he lost his right to enter the Promised Land.

The wages of sin is always death.  Sometimes it happens immediately, sometimes it takes years to happen, sometimes it just keeps building with each generation.  I hate the pain that sin causes.  I never want to cause another person – or myself – that pain again, if I can help it.

As I think about sin, wages, death and pain, suddenly the last couple of years of waiting don’t seem so bad.  God’s timing is always best.  His ways are always right.  He brings life and joy and peace and contentment.

Yeah, I can wait.